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Routine and Connection
Routine and Connection
This has been a week hasn't it? I've been around the houses in my mind about so many things and then put myself firmly back in my safe circle. I hope you've been able to find clam and contentment of some sort in the middle of all of this.
You are doing a fabulous job being exactly who you are and holding everyone together as well.
This week, I have been really aware of my babies and the effect all this worry is having on them. Not that I've never not been aware of them but it has felt very real this week. They went back to school - for which I am grateful - being with their friends is so hugely important for their mental health and feelings of positivity - I cannot replace friends of their own age.
Grace had a university entrance exam on Thursday and Neave was 14 last Sunday. All these milestones passing us by in the middle of this global storm. I'm sure that you have had to mange milestones in completely different ways to those you envisioned. I want to let you know that it is ok. You being there is enough for your babies.
I have learned in my years of mothering that we will all make mistakes. Poor Gracie, she's the oldest so she bears the brunt of those. You learn about parenting as you do it and mistakes are inevitable. Your baby is going to fall off the bed (both mine did), your baby is going to be upset when things don't go her way and you cannot be there for them each time they fall (literally or otherwise) and they will fall in many ways. Your heart will break - sometimes more than once a day.
You will be ok and they will be ok.
Someone told me once, when I was panicking about being a rubbish mother and letting the girls down over something, that if you act from a place of love you can do no harm. Those words gave me such comfort that they have become one of my personal mantras.
I am pretty 100% certain that you always parent from a place of love. That is enough.
I came across these quotes from Emily W King this week and wanted to share them with you as images because I think they will help you to feel better. She is worth following.
Stability, connection, routine, play and laughter. I bet you do all or almost all of these every day. That means you are giving your babies everything they need.
Stability - they have you, a home, their bedroom, food, loving arms to be cuddled in and love.
Connection - they have your smile, your touch, the knowledge that they form part of a family and they have love.
Routine - don't get lost in this one because babies do not have a routine as we know it but they do have your face every day and clean nappies when they need them. Older children have routine of meal times, school or nursery and the knowledge that they get stories and cuddles every night at bed time.
Play - lose yourself in play too. Play can mean running through fallen leaves in the park, colouring, watching Paw Patrol, jumping in puddles and tickling until they cry with laughter and love.
Laughter - laugh through play, laugh at tea time, tell really bad jokes, wiggle your bottom (I still do this!), pull funny faces, sing and dance until your baby explodes into giggles. Let yourself laugh too. Laughter creates our love hormone - oxytocin.
Please take some pressure off yourself. Our babies and our children are resilient. Protect them by continuing to do what you do and also make sure that you protect yourself by being very kind and gentle to you - a little lowering of expectations is never a bad thing.
This will pass.
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What our mums say...
Every class provides a relaxed and friendly environment
I first attended baby massage classes when my son was 3 months old, and then went on to do mum and baby yoga, and I’m on my 4th block of classes now (my son is now 9 months old!) Every class provides a relaxed and friendly environment, great yoga for post pregnancy, focussing on pelvic floor exercises and breathing, and a general feel good hour where you can forget about the outside world. The cake and tea are a bonus at the end of the classes and I have met some really lovely moms through attending. Mandy has a special gift at teaching and she never fails to create a relaxed environment for the babies, who all seem fixated by her presence. I am so glad I found her classes as Wednesdays are my favourite days of the week! Cannot recommend enough.
Mandy really encourages everyone
I first attended Mandy’s pregnancy yoga classes when I was pregnant with my first baby, the yoga helped hugely with my pregnancy aches and pains but most of all the support and encouragement from both Mandy and the rest of the group was amazing. Mandy really encourages everyone to engage with each other which wasn’t something that I had experienced in other groups I attended, it meant that I felt safe in asking that daft question or verbalising my fears! I then went on to attend baby massage and postnatal yoga with my first baby and again the support and ability to engage with other new moms was fantastic! I have recently had my second baby and attended pregnancy yoga, whilst I had less concerns and worries about pregnancy and birth the classes gave me a dedicated hour to have just for me...which was so important and you don’t get much time to yourself when you are running around after a toddler! I am now attending postnatal yoga and although this is having to be done via zoom Mandy has continued to provide a safe environment and an opportunity to engage with other Moms! Thank you Mandy you help me keep my sanity!
SO glad I'd found Mandy and her classes
I had previously been to a few different yoga classes and found them a bit intense and not what I was looking for. I heard about Mandy's prenatal yoga classes through a friend and it sounded just what I was looking for. From the first session I was SO glad I'd found Mandy and her classes. They are way more than a yoga class - meditation, breathing exercises, relaxation and a chance to chat to other expectant mums and soak in Mandy's wisdom. The jammie dodgers are a welcome bonus to the class too! Since lockdown the classes were via zoom and this worked really well and I still had the same sense of connection and relaxation I got from the in person class. Between classes I also did Mandy's yoga sessions on her website which really helped me stay relaxed and helped my aches and pains. I also made sure I regularly listened to her audio relaxations which helped me stay calm and grounded in those final weeks. Above all of this, Mandy has been a wonderful support and checked in with me after the birth of my daughter and during our hospital stay - Mandy really does go above and beyond and puts out some brilliant online content. I can't thank her enough!
Mandy is such a positive influence
I went to Mandy's pregnancy yoga class for a block of 8 lessons. I enjoyed it so much that I kept going for another two blocks. You may think you're going for yoga, but it's so much more. Mandy is such a positive influence on how you feel about your pregnancy, birth and parenting. I gained friends, lost any fear of giving birth and am looking forward to joining one of her baby classes with my newborn.
Absolutely love her classes
I returned to Mandy's pregnancy yoga classes following my second pregnancy as I absolutely loved her classes first time round and made some solid friendships.
Mandy creates such a welcoming and safe environment. She is passionate about ensuring mums and mums to be have a support network alongside the yoga which is so vital. Her classes provide opportunities for open discussion around pregnancy/childbirth/motherhood and no question is out of bounds!
Following the birth of my daughter, I went on to attend baby massage and baby yoga classes, both of which I can thoroughly recommend. Baby massage has given me some really helpful techniques to manage baby's trapped wind and has also helped me deepen the bond with my little ones. Baby yoga was surprisingly more relaxing than I expected! I have made some amazing friendships that have continued post classes. I would definitely recommend Mandy's classes. She is so honest and puts her heart and soul into her classes.
I feel empowered as a pregnant woman and as a future mum
I signed up to the class to get to meet local expectant mums with the side benefit of a nice stretch. I did meet some lovely local mums and found it so helpful to have a space where you could talk about any issues and get advice or support. What really surprised me was how much I valued the yoga and stretching but mostly the breathing exercises. It gave me a toolkit of things to do during pregnancy and also in Labour and has made me feel excited for the birth! Mandy’s affirmations during the rest time have really spoken to me and made me feel empowered as a pregnant woman and as a future mum.
The class was so beneficial to me, to have a space just for me to enjoy my pregnancy and learn about the things I can do in birth to help it be a positive event. Thank you!
Mandy understands that babies have their own minds...
Mandy was extremely friendly and made me feel at ease so quickly. Which was fantastic as I was nervous being the youngest mum in the room. It was good to introduce everybody and nice for Mandy to explain she understands babies have their own minds so if we wanted to we could feed or change nappies just simply watch.
And she really meant it.
Having tea and cake at the end of each session made you stay and engage with the mums. I loved how Mandy explained all the benefits of the different massages e.g. winds/sinuses Oh and one final thing I loved the goody bag! Couldn’t rate the class highly enough.
I did want to say thank you. Your classes are fantastic - you explain everything so clearly and know which achy bits to work on. It has made me think that I should find a ‘normal’ (ie not postnatal) yoga class post-lockdown, but finding the time will be a big challenge! I also think that what you do for mums is great and I hope that you will be able to start your classes in person again soon. If I come across any mums to be or new mums I will certainly recommend you, although Arlo was a late (and very happy) addition to our family and most of the mums I know have kids at school now. That’s been another positive for me actually - being able to connect with people going through the baby/pregnancy stage as otherwise it would have been very easy to neglect that side of my life with the demands of having other young children. One of the unforeseen bonuses of Mandy's classes was that my baby always slept for three hours afterwards!